May 15, 2019
In this episode, we meet
Ari Galper, the World’s #1 Authority on Trust-Based Selling
on trust and influence, eliminating resistance and being a sales
magnet not chaser.
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Ari is the World’s #1 Authority
on Trust-Based Selling and is one the most expensive sales growth
advisors in the world.
He is the creator of
Unlock The Game®, a completely revolutionary sales approach and
has clients in over 35 countries.
Ari has a Masters Degree in
Instructional Design and is a practitioner of Aikido, a special
martial art that diffuses conflict between two parties.
Ari is based in Sydney,
Australia with his wife Michelle and their two sons and
In this episode we talk
- Building trust first before anything else, so
that you create influence;
- Eliminating resistance in any communication
with a prospect;
the language you use is so critical, and some practical examples of
phrases to remove from your life; and
myth of chasing sales, and instead becoming a sales
Connecting with Ari
You can reach Ari in the
Thanks to Perry Marshall for recommending Ari.
we discovered in our research is that rejection is triggered by
certain things you say and do unknowingly that cause the other
person to push back on you.
that comes down to the words you say (languaging), the way you say
it (delivery) and how much authority you have (positioning). Those
three things are the triggers, and if you don't have one of them,
you'll get rejection every single day.
On starting with building
trust, not pushing for a sale
- Whatever you're offering to them is about a
solution to their problem; if you try and sell your project by
talking about the benefits of it and not addressing their issue,
that is a mismatch there. It will feel like you're trying to put
your agenda before theirs.
example is: "Hi, my name is ... I'm with VRA, we specialise in
this." That's kind of a pitch. What you'd say instead is, "I'm
hoping you can help me out for a moment. I'm just giving you a call
to see if you'd be open to some different ideas around ways to
solve the issues you're having related to sales and project
management. Would you be open to that?"
- That's the mindset shift I talk about in the
game - it’s shifting away from the end goal of the sale and
focusing only on trust first. If your goal is trust first, you
don't talk about yourself, you talk about them. That's the whole
mindset shift that I teach.
On doing your
- Nowadays, you can't go fishing for their
problems anymore. "Hey, how you doing? How's your business going?
What problems do you have?" That used to work five years
should probably already have a sense of what the top three issues
are that your clients deal with, so start with those.
have to ask yourself what the value is to them to consider your
suggestion. Make a list of all the things you offer in which they
would see value.
On the biggest lesson in his
years ago I was a sales manager in a software company and we
launched the first online website tracking tools to collect website
behaviour - it's now called Google Analytics. In the end, after
what I thought was a successful sales call, I overheard them say,
"We're not gonna go with him. Keep using him for more information
and make sure we shop someplace else cheaper."
forced me to question what I did wrong, and that became our Unlock
The Game mindset premise, where our goal was to remove the pressure
from the sales conversation to basically shift away from the end
goal of the sale to building trust first, to make sure both you and
them were fit to decide whether to proceed.
On a better set of sales
businesses measure the sales people's performance based on certain
behaviours. For instance, the numbers game, so that’s how many
contacts they make, how many meetings they have, how many
presentations they do and how many closes do they make. But none of
those issues has to do with trust, meaning there's no measurement
on how good they are at building trust in the process.
salespeople are being conditioned to hunt, to kill, to bring in the
money, but they ought to learn how to stop chasing, stop selling
and build trust instead.
developed what we call Trust-Based Languaging to replace sales
I'll ask you vigorously to remove one key phrase from your
vocabulary forever, and that is “follow up”. By saying "follow up"
you're asking, “How does this person move closer to a sale for
- Instead say, "I'm giving you a call to see if
you have any feedback on our previous conversation, our proposal or
on us." So, you actually go backwards, not forwards.
phrase “would you be interested?” is a sales phrase, so get rid of
it. Instead try, "Hey, I've got a plan that might be able to help
you out, would you be open to hearing this?"
On how to jump to the next
level in your career
focus on jumping. Find the person who's at that level and find out
what value they could use that they don't have right now, and offer
it to them. Just focus on the next person up who's the key player
there and ask them what their challenges are and approach them with
On recovering a lost sale -
“the magic response”
you're chasing somebody and you don't hear back from them for a
while, you feel like you've lost them. You know you can't chase
them anymore otherwise you're going to burn the relationship with
them. What you do is call them back or email them and say something
to the effect of:
“Hi John. It's Ari I hope
you're doing well.
Look, I'm not calling to
move things forward at all.
I'm just calling to first of
all apologise. I hadn't heard back from you for a few weeks so it's
probably me. I may have dropped the ball, I may have missed
something, maybe I chased you too hard. I just want to apologise
for whatever I may have done that didn't have you call me
And look, I'm only calling
for one reason, and that is for some feedback to improve myself in
the event there are a few opportunities with other people, so I can
become a better person. Would you be open to that feedback to
above approach helps release the pressure, but by falling on your
sword, it's amazing as 95% of the time they say, “No, it’s not you”
and then they give you the truthful feedback you’re after, or might
give you another look.
On sales myths
is the whole numbers game concept. That is dead. It's not about how
many contacts you make in your networks anymore, it's about how
much trust you create with every single person.
- Another one is the idea that your job is to
overcome objections. But what if what they're telling you is true?
So if someone says to you your price is too high, if you try to
overcome the objection, you would either bring the price down or
defend yourself. Instead, defuse the objection, re-engage again
without risking the relationship with the sale and say, "You're
absolutely right. It can be perceived as high, no doubt about that.
In fact, everyone joins this at first says the exact same thing as
you. Look, the last thing I want to do is try and convince you to
do something you don't want to do, that's just unethical to even do
that in the first place. But would you be open to re-looking at
this from a different perspective, based on the topic issue we are
trying to solve? Would you be open to that?"
one final one is that sales messages need to be heard multiple
times before a customer acts. Well, the formula is actually not
based upon the number of touches, it's based on what the message is
in those touches.
do you need to be working on that impacts 95% of your business? I
spend a lot of time thinking about what I should be doing every day
that has the biggest impact on what I do.
night I'll think about what the three things are that I need to do
today to be successful. As Jeff Bezos says, "If I just make three
decisions a day, I can go home."
Final message of wisdom and
- Always be open to someone else challenging your
assumptions, to make sure that you know what you know, but
recognise you may not know it all and always strive to be able to
say that you’re cutting-edge but others have been there before. So
keep seeking out answers for things you may not know